By Rachel Tanner

After Jackass Forever (2022)

Watching a video of me
in high school the other month – a decade
younger & a lifetime newer –
my boyfriend said I’ve never heard
you laugh like that & I’ve been
thinking about it ever since. What is it
about time that makes us
change? It’s been so long
since my stomach hurt from laughing
too much. (Too much? Since when
is there a “too much?”) But

we turned on Jackass Forever & suddenly
I was back at my best friend Amanda’s
house dancing to Enrique Iglesias, making
mix CDs with Lauren, filming nonsense
at the new uncrowded outdoor mall with
Stephanie – & all the time, laughing.

Who knew that lighting farts on fire
would still be funny in my 30s? I
guffawed, letting myself belt out
the joy I didn’t even realize I’d been
missing. Those long
summer days of my youth watching
grown men
get kicked in the balls on screen led
to this night, right when I needed it.